As I’ve grown older I feel my love for movies has matured. I still enjoy the dumb comedies and the popcorn flicks just as much as the next guy, but for some reason I don’t enjoy them as much as I used to. Today I was watching Mallrats and a few months ago I sat down to re-watch Clerks. I love Kevin Smith. I’ll see anything he puts out. I think he’s hilarious. I used to think he was one of the greatest writers living today. While I was watching Mallrats today, however, some of the dialogue made me cringe. It’s snappy and witty and often times funny, but some of the lines just didn’t sound right. Characters are yelling at each other and spewing out wordy sentences that just didn’t feel natural. I felt bad for the actors because I could tell it was hard for them to try and keep the emotion while screaming a line that could have been said in less words. I don’t really consider myself a writer. I am attempting to write a screenplay now, but I’d call myself amateur at best. I have a hard time expressing myself in words, which is often times frustrating. Like now, for example. I’m having a hard time explaining how I still love Kevin Smith and will always consider Mallrats hilarious, (the third act still makes me laugh) but have grown to like his dialogue a little less than before. I don’t recall having the same feelings during Clerks 2. So perhaps he feels the same way. Who knows?
I’m frustrated with myself for putting things off for so long. I’m mainly referring to writing the script, shooting the movie and my overall acting “career.” There’s a part of me that wonders, even once the script is written, whether or not we will actually get around to shooting the movie. What then? I feel like I have no choice but to shoot the movie. The main thing I’m worried about is how many people I can get to help behind the scenes as well as in front of the camera. The last thing I tried to shoot was in college and I had a lot of people say they were interested only to drop out later or I couldn’t get in touch with them at all. I’m not worried about the actual shooting of the movie. In fact, I’m looking forward to it. I want to test out my skills as a director. I just hope we can get enough people to commit to it. Christopher Nolan’s first film had to only be shot on weekends (due to the cast and crew’s jobs during the week). It took him a full year to film. That means his cast and crew were willing to give up their weekends for a full year to help him out. I don’t know whether or not he paid them, but I doubt it seeing as how it was a completely independent film with a budget of about $6,000. I don’t think any of that went to actors or crew. If there even was a crew.
I guess first things first. I need to finish the script. Then I can move on from there. It’s also scary to think about writing. I think it’s a great idea and could be a really great film. I just hope it’s as good on paper as it is in my mind. We’ll have to see.
I’m thinking about starting a blogspot.